I downloaded all the DotSpatial NuGet packages into a new project and I have no map tools. If I try to load the controls.dll into the tool window, I get  an error about "can't find dotSpatial.controls.extension.

Do I have ti get get a separate copy of the Controls.dll?

You won't need duplicate copies of the same dlls, but for tools, you will need a Tools dll and a ToolManager dll. You can get these from the DotSpatial -myget- feed.

Note that when you install the Controls dll, DotSpatial.Extensions is a dependency and is retrieved automatically: http://nuget.org/packages/DotSpatial.Controls

I started over and here is what happens

PM> install-Package Dotspatial.controls
Attempting to resolve dependency 'DotSpatial.Data'.
Attempting to resolve dependency 'DotSpatial.Serialization'.
Attempting to resolve dependency 'DotSpatial.Topology'.
Attempting to resolve dependency 'DotSpatial.Projections'.
Install-Package : Exception of type 'System.OutOfMemoryException' was thrown.
At line:1 char:16
+ install-Package <<<<  Dotspatial.controls
    + CategoryInfo          : NotSpecified: (:) [Install-Package], OutOfMemoryException
    + FullyQualifiedErrorId : NuGetCmdletUnhandledException,NuGet.PowerShell.Commands.InstallPackageCommand
 
PM>

Well, I tried it again and it seems to have worked this time, but I still have no controls. If I try to load the Crontrol dll, VS says it can't be loaded..

Forget it, I just downloaded the zip file